It is my not-so-secret belief that the old ways are usually the best. Most of what we are supposed to buy for our kids these days is more about marketing than actual development. Babies need you--your face, your eyes, your moving mouth--more than they need any toy. They need your arms, and the physical joy of riding snuggled against your body, more than they need any car seat or stroller.
As I make decisions about how to raise my son, I often refer back to what my parents did with me. They were minimalist types as well, and their sensibilities were really those of an even older generation. Before the recalls on plastic toys, we had wooden ones because plastic was "tacky." Before the era of ultra-engineered colic-proof baby bottles, we were breastfed because, well, the breast is right there, the baby is hungry, and formula costs money.
When it was time for shoes, we went to the shoe store and were fitted for navy blue mary janes, with half an inch of "growing room" in the toe. From age four through eight, successively larger sizes of mary janes were all there was.
Before my memories, even, there were other shoes: little white first-walking shoes with bells. The bells were actually on little plastic capsules that enclosed the laces so I couldn't untie the shoes.
...So I couldn't untie the shoes. There's a clue there.
My son is crawling and standing and seriously thinking about walking. So naturally my maternal instincts turn to thoughts of shoes. Which shoes are best for my baby? Which shoes will give him healthy feet and help him learn to walk?
The answer, it turns out, is: None at all.
The little white walking shoes, and their little bells, and their little childproof laces are not good for babies' feet, as it happens. Babies want to learn to walk without shoes that throw them off balance. Naturally, they will try to take their stiff shoes off.
So all that business about shoes helping your feet to grow? That was misguided at best, and sheer marketing bullshit at worst. Podiatrists now recommend that children go entirely shoeless for the first 3 years of life, and shoeless at home until age 12.
Won't my baby's feet get cold? Unless you have a concrete floor in your house, your little one's feet will be fine. Baby feet should be cool to the touch.
Won't my baby's feet get dirty? Ideally, everyone should go shoeless at home, not just the under-12 set. Your baby's feet won't get dirty if your floor isn't dirty. And your floor won't be dirty if you're not tracking in dirt from outside. Leave your shoes at the door. And if you really are concerned about dirty feet, remember feet are washable!
For going outdoors in winter, and for walking and crawling in strange places, a soft unstructured slipper-shoe like Robeez is very convenient. We have several pairs and love 'em. Robeez are little elasticized leather booties that slip on easily. They wear well and often show up at resale shops.
Another brand of baby shoe I've heard good things about (but can't vouch for personally) is Pedoodles. These are a little more fashion forward and "finished" looking (no elastic). They come in a variety of adorable styles.
I am as vulnerable to adorable styles as anyone else, but where shoes are concerned, I think it's better to be cautious than fashionable. Truly, where infant shoes are concerned, LESS IS MORE.
Update: A friend just turned me on to Bobux. Not only have Bobux worked well for her son, but these shoes use a non-toxic leather.
My son is worse than any puppy when it comes to chewing on shoes. His own little shoes are the top target. When you consider that conventional tanning and leather-dyeing techniques are awash in toxins, it's hard to allow him this dangerous satisfaction. So I pry shoes away from him several times a day, and he complains quite shrilly.
But Bobux...he can chew them! I'm so excited for this, for my peace of mind, and for my son's impending delight.
Showing posts with label simple living. Show all posts
Showing posts with label simple living. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Monday, September 22, 2008
Clutter and the "Next Little Thing"
The recent story about tiny houses in the New York Times makes me smile. After living in a space the size of an office cubicle for a year and a half, any living space where you have room to take a few steps seems large.
The article neglects the obvious: that our friends the Japanese have always lived in tiny spaces. They do not complain. They find ways to conserve space: storing the bedding in a closet and rolling it out at night; building closet-like prefab fiberglass bathrooms; cooking in a kitchen barely large enough to turn around in. Thanks to that tiny kitchen, you might run down to the grocer for meal ingredients. Your limited private space makes you more likely to use public space for relaxing and general living; an evening stroll in one's pajamas is common in Japan. Tiny living space synergizes with ready access to public space to create a lifestyle where the personal and the communal are interwoven.
I don't mean to suggest that Japan is a utopia; it's just different. One lifestyle issue that plagues everyone who tries to live in a small space is CLUTTER. Those of us who enjoy acquiring meaningful (at least at the time) objects, know the depressing stagnation that can come from having a messy space. And those of us with children are in awe of our babies' magical powers when it comes to generating new possessions.
Some rules of thumb that have helped me in my quest for freedom in a small space:
Unbroken lines of sight are important.
Do not fill every inch of space. You need an open stretch of floor. A bare wall somewhere. These provide a visual cue that somehow relaxes the mind.
By the same token, do not spread objects out if you can cluster them instead. For example, if you arrange your potted plants in a clump on the windowsill, there will be plants and there will be the visual relief of windowsill. Plants that are spaced along the sill appear to fill the area, and your windowsill will appear cluttered.
You must arrange furnishings so as to optimize the square feet you do have. Perhaps the arrangement should chage depending on time of day. The Japanese stash bedding in a closet during the day, and set up futon on the open floor at night.
Reduce paperwork.
Ideally, you may not need a desk at all. Think about it. You can pay bills online; tote your laptop out when you need it; and stash it when you don't.
When you do get paper bills, don't 't keep them around; pay them and dispose of them. Paying over the phone using a credit card is quick and easy; if you choose instead to mail a check, do so at once.
Reduce the amount of mail you receive.
Register for the national "No Junk Mail List" (its actual name is something more poetic). Unlike the national Do-Not-Call registry, which is administrated by the Federal Government, and which telemarketers can be fined for disregarding, this is a private service that mail marketers can voluntarily access. So why would they take your name off their mailing lists? Because direct marketing to someone who doesn't want it costs them money. It's worth a try; you certainly won't receive more mail because of it! Of course, those pesky flier addressed to "Occupant", "Resident", or "Esteemed Neighbor" will probably continue.
Do your mail-order shopping online. When you place an order, request not to receive paper catalogs, and specifically request that the company also not share or sell your name. Similarly, when you subscribe to a magazine, remember to ask that they not share or sell your name. When stray mailings do arrive, immediately call to have them canceled. It's worth a minute of your time to prevent your name being sold to the next catalog, and the next.
Stash. But Wisely.
Small items you need ready access to can be stored in a cabinet. It can be a built-in cabinet, say in the kitchen; or a separate piece of furniture. Whatever you choose, it must have doors (or drawers) that close completely to present a clean uncluttered front. envelopes and arch supports and cloth napkin collection need to go somewhere. I'm currently using sleek-looking sideboard. Each shelf or drawer has its theme. For example: "personal health" (arch supports, first aid, extra ointments and lotions); "correspondence" (envelopes, stamps, address book, greeting cards); "gifts" (tchotchkes for regifting, pretty boxes, wrap, and ribbons); "dining" (cloth napkins and tablecloths). In a small house, there's no reason not to store your extra toiletries near your office supplies. Your storage area is never going to be far from the kitchen, or the bathroom, or the study.
Store it? Or send it to the store?
Small items you do not need ready access to are objects that your life in its current form probably doesn't require. Some people suggest putting these items--old clothes, old files--in opaque boxes or bags, mark them with a "dispose-by" date, and chuck them when you've lived that long without requiring the contents.
Especially if you are paying for storage, consider the monthly cost of retaining things you do not use, versus the value of the items and the trouble to reacquire them. A year's worth of storage costs at least $600. Are your unused treasures worth that?
If you don't need it, and it's small, it's probably an item of sentimental significance. Is there some way--besides entombment in a storage box--to memorialize the camp T-shirt you never wear, or a decade-old crumbling art project? I took digital photos of many of my crumbling childhood mementos. That made it easier to part with them, and I find that I don't miss them at all. If I'm feeling nostalgic, I can always call up the photo on my computer--where it takes up virtually no space at all.
If you live simply and are not afraid of second-hand items, it may behoove you to dispose of things and repurchase similar ones, rather than storing your treasures or letting them clutter your living space. I do this with clothes I'm tired of. I donate old shirts and skirts to the second-hand store where I bought them, and come home with "new" items. Essentially, the second-hand store functions as a sort of giant closet, from which I rent this season's outfits.
So donate what you aren't using. And when you do need something, you can often find it at Goodwill or a local thrift store for pennies on the dollar.
Clutter is just part of the story
Controlling clutter is an important aspect of living in a small space. But it's not the only consideration. Living in a small space entails a certain creativity. You will be forced to question your assumptions about what a living space needs, and what you need to live in a space. What do I really have to keep, and what can I digitize? What can I donate? What can do double duty?
Living a simple, ecologically-aware lifestyle means being unafraid to recycle and reuse objects. Controlling clutter means becoming free from bondage to your stuff.
P.S. ...a word on antiques
When the time does come to buy something, consider whether a new item is really necessary. Even discounting the issue of sustainability, used items are often superior. I have found that antiques are generally more sturdy, attractive and economical than new furniture. They retain their value well. And they are built to a scale appropriate for smaller spaces.
Relevant advice on life in small spaces from Treehugger here.
The article neglects the obvious: that our friends the Japanese have always lived in tiny spaces. They do not complain. They find ways to conserve space: storing the bedding in a closet and rolling it out at night; building closet-like prefab fiberglass bathrooms; cooking in a kitchen barely large enough to turn around in. Thanks to that tiny kitchen, you might run down to the grocer for meal ingredients. Your limited private space makes you more likely to use public space for relaxing and general living; an evening stroll in one's pajamas is common in Japan. Tiny living space synergizes with ready access to public space to create a lifestyle where the personal and the communal are interwoven.
I don't mean to suggest that Japan is a utopia; it's just different. One lifestyle issue that plagues everyone who tries to live in a small space is CLUTTER. Those of us who enjoy acquiring meaningful (at least at the time) objects, know the depressing stagnation that can come from having a messy space. And those of us with children are in awe of our babies' magical powers when it comes to generating new possessions.
Some rules of thumb that have helped me in my quest for freedom in a small space:
Unbroken lines of sight are important.
Do not fill every inch of space. You need an open stretch of floor. A bare wall somewhere. These provide a visual cue that somehow relaxes the mind.
By the same token, do not spread objects out if you can cluster them instead. For example, if you arrange your potted plants in a clump on the windowsill, there will be plants and there will be the visual relief of windowsill. Plants that are spaced along the sill appear to fill the area, and your windowsill will appear cluttered.
You must arrange furnishings so as to optimize the square feet you do have. Perhaps the arrangement should chage depending on time of day. The Japanese stash bedding in a closet during the day, and set up futon on the open floor at night.
Reduce paperwork.
Ideally, you may not need a desk at all. Think about it. You can pay bills online; tote your laptop out when you need it; and stash it when you don't.
When you do get paper bills, don't 't keep them around; pay them and dispose of them. Paying over the phone using a credit card is quick and easy; if you choose instead to mail a check, do so at once.
Reduce the amount of mail you receive.
Register for the national "No Junk Mail List" (its actual name is something more poetic). Unlike the national Do-Not-Call registry, which is administrated by the Federal Government, and which telemarketers can be fined for disregarding, this is a private service that mail marketers can voluntarily access. So why would they take your name off their mailing lists? Because direct marketing to someone who doesn't want it costs them money. It's worth a try; you certainly won't receive more mail because of it! Of course, those pesky flier addressed to "Occupant", "Resident", or "Esteemed Neighbor" will probably continue.
Do your mail-order shopping online. When you place an order, request not to receive paper catalogs, and specifically request that the company also not share or sell your name. Similarly, when you subscribe to a magazine, remember to ask that they not share or sell your name. When stray mailings do arrive, immediately call to have them canceled. It's worth a minute of your time to prevent your name being sold to the next catalog, and the next.
Stash. But Wisely.
Small items you need ready access to can be stored in a cabinet. It can be a built-in cabinet, say in the kitchen; or a separate piece of furniture. Whatever you choose, it must have doors (or drawers) that close completely to present a clean uncluttered front. envelopes and arch supports and cloth napkin collection need to go somewhere. I'm currently using sleek-looking sideboard. Each shelf or drawer has its theme. For example: "personal health" (arch supports, first aid, extra ointments and lotions); "correspondence" (envelopes, stamps, address book, greeting cards); "gifts" (tchotchkes for regifting, pretty boxes, wrap, and ribbons); "dining" (cloth napkins and tablecloths). In a small house, there's no reason not to store your extra toiletries near your office supplies. Your storage area is never going to be far from the kitchen, or the bathroom, or the study.
Store it? Or send it to the store?
Small items you do not need ready access to are objects that your life in its current form probably doesn't require. Some people suggest putting these items--old clothes, old files--in opaque boxes or bags, mark them with a "dispose-by" date, and chuck them when you've lived that long without requiring the contents.
Especially if you are paying for storage, consider the monthly cost of retaining things you do not use, versus the value of the items and the trouble to reacquire them. A year's worth of storage costs at least $600. Are your unused treasures worth that?
If you don't need it, and it's small, it's probably an item of sentimental significance. Is there some way--besides entombment in a storage box--to memorialize the camp T-shirt you never wear, or a decade-old crumbling art project? I took digital photos of many of my crumbling childhood mementos. That made it easier to part with them, and I find that I don't miss them at all. If I'm feeling nostalgic, I can always call up the photo on my computer--where it takes up virtually no space at all.
If you live simply and are not afraid of second-hand items, it may behoove you to dispose of things and repurchase similar ones, rather than storing your treasures or letting them clutter your living space. I do this with clothes I'm tired of. I donate old shirts and skirts to the second-hand store where I bought them, and come home with "new" items. Essentially, the second-hand store functions as a sort of giant closet, from which I rent this season's outfits.
So donate what you aren't using. And when you do need something, you can often find it at Goodwill or a local thrift store for pennies on the dollar.
Clutter is just part of the story
Controlling clutter is an important aspect of living in a small space. But it's not the only consideration. Living in a small space entails a certain creativity. You will be forced to question your assumptions about what a living space needs, and what you need to live in a space. What do I really have to keep, and what can I digitize? What can I donate? What can do double duty?
Living a simple, ecologically-aware lifestyle means being unafraid to recycle and reuse objects. Controlling clutter means becoming free from bondage to your stuff.
P.S. ...a word on antiques
When the time does come to buy something, consider whether a new item is really necessary. Even discounting the issue of sustainability, used items are often superior. I have found that antiques are generally more sturdy, attractive and economical than new furniture. They retain their value well. And they are built to a scale appropriate for smaller spaces.
Relevant advice on life in small spaces from Treehugger here.
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