It is my not-so-secret belief that the old ways are usually the best. Most of what we are supposed to buy for our kids these days is more about marketing than actual development. Babies need you--your face, your eyes, your moving mouth--more than they need any toy. They need your arms, and the physical joy of riding snuggled against your body, more than they need any car seat or stroller.
As I make decisions about how to raise my son, I often refer back to what my parents did with me. They were minimalist types as well, and their sensibilities were really those of an even older generation. Before the recalls on plastic toys, we had wooden ones because plastic was "tacky." Before the era of ultra-engineered colic-proof baby bottles, we were breastfed because, well, the breast is right there, the baby is hungry, and formula costs money.
When it was time for shoes, we went to the shoe store and were fitted for navy blue mary janes, with half an inch of "growing room" in the toe. From age four through eight, successively larger sizes of mary janes were all there was.
Before my memories, even, there were other shoes: little white first-walking shoes with bells. The bells were actually on little plastic capsules that enclosed the laces so I couldn't untie the shoes.
...So I couldn't untie the shoes. There's a clue there.
My son is crawling and standing and seriously thinking about walking. So naturally my maternal instincts turn to thoughts of shoes. Which shoes are best for my baby? Which shoes will give him healthy feet and help him learn to walk?
The answer, it turns out, is: None at all.
The little white walking shoes, and their little bells, and their little childproof laces are not good for babies' feet, as it happens. Babies want to learn to walk without shoes that throw them off balance. Naturally, they will try to take their stiff shoes off.
So all that business about shoes helping your feet to grow? That was misguided at best, and sheer marketing bullshit at worst. Podiatrists now recommend that children go entirely shoeless for the first 3 years of life, and shoeless at home until age 12.
Won't my baby's feet get cold? Unless you have a concrete floor in your house, your little one's feet will be fine. Baby feet should be cool to the touch.
Won't my baby's feet get dirty? Ideally, everyone should go shoeless at home, not just the under-12 set. Your baby's feet won't get dirty if your floor isn't dirty. And your floor won't be dirty if you're not tracking in dirt from outside. Leave your shoes at the door. And if you really are concerned about dirty feet, remember feet are washable!
For going outdoors in winter, and for walking and crawling in strange places, a soft unstructured slipper-shoe like Robeez is very convenient. We have several pairs and love 'em. Robeez are little elasticized leather booties that slip on easily. They wear well and often show up at resale shops.
Another brand of baby shoe I've heard good things about (but can't vouch for personally) is Pedoodles. These are a little more fashion forward and "finished" looking (no elastic). They come in a variety of adorable styles.
I am as vulnerable to adorable styles as anyone else, but where shoes are concerned, I think it's better to be cautious than fashionable. Truly, where infant shoes are concerned, LESS IS MORE.
Update: A friend just turned me on to Bobux. Not only have Bobux worked well for her son, but these shoes use a non-toxic leather.
My son is worse than any puppy when it comes to chewing on shoes. His own little shoes are the top target. When you consider that conventional tanning and leather-dyeing techniques are awash in toxins, it's hard to allow him this dangerous satisfaction. So I pry shoes away from him several times a day, and he complains quite shrilly.
But Bobux...he can chew them! I'm so excited for this, for my peace of mind, and for my son's impending delight.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
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